Sophie is now 5 weeks old and what a 5 weeks it has been. 5 weeks is so tiny yet it feels like she's been here 6 months already. We are adjusting to being a family of 4 which still sounds strange to me, a family of how many?!
Alice seems to be adjusting quite well to having a little sister. I think in her world, as long there's chocolate she's a happy girl. She doesn't seem that interested in Sophie most of the time. She will occasionally stroke her head, say she is soft or that she's crying (and is then quick to hand me a dummy!) Or that she's having a nappy change...but that's about it.
Sophie is obviously oblivious to anything that doesn't involve food or sleep. Alice can scream in her face and she doesn't even flinch. My head touches the pillow however and she will cry for England.
So what are the main differences as a mum of two so far?
I have learned you need to lower your expectations of what can be achieved in a day. Some days you have to count being able to shower as a win...even though you couldn't dry your hair and you had a crying baby serenading you throughout. As for make up, I think I can forget about that for now.
That beautiful, elusive thing called sleep. I used to want at least a good 4 hours of straight sleep. Now? I feel glad when I get to close my eyes for 5 minutes especially if the house is quiet at the same time.
Mealtimes have changed a lot. I have a small person who doesn't want to eat anything and when she does want to eat she seems to want to put on the floor first. I have a tiny person who doesn't want to STOP eating which means I spend a good part of my day with a boob out chasing a toddler around with some sort of food while she tells me no and repeatedly asks for yogurts. You would think there is a limit to the amount of yogurt a small person can consume; there isn't.
Some days actually feel easy, everything works out and everyone seems in sync. Then there are other days like today where it feels like utter chaos. The kitchen is full of dishes, the living room floor is covered in brightly coloured crap, there are muslins and bibs all over the place and I am having to watch The Secret Life Of Pets for the third time this week.
Despite the chaos and lack of showering I am happy and generally feel at peace. No matter how bad the worst days have been since Sophie was born they are nothing compared to how I felt after Alice's birth. I think I understand even more now just how much that experience affected my life. I feel sad for my past self but also incredibly grateful that I don't spend my days reliving a traumatic birth and spend my nights feeling panicked but not knowing why. I feel healed and like I can finally enjoy looking to the future which is exactly what I intend to do.